A series exposing actual stupid things Christians say to women in abusive marriages. Today we look at two: “If you gave your husband more respect, he’d love you,” and “if you submitted to the authority of your church, you’d get the help you need.” Could someone hand me a bucket?
After decades of dealing with your husband’s covert control, silent treatment, criticism, passive aggressive behavior, lies, and refusal to take responsibility for anything, you have made the terrifying decision to get out, and now you are on your own. Either your husband has left (and told everyone you abusively kicked him out) or he has forced you to leave (and told everyone that you have abusively abandoned him.) The smear campaign begins even while you begin the life-long process of picking up all the pieces. You have eight kids living at home. You get to pick up their pieces too.
When you separate from an abusive partner, you find the peace that comes from not being in close proximity with emotional/spiritual abuse. However, as your to-do list grows exponentially, so your support declines. Here are some ways to cope with that.
Finding a good therapist can be a critical part of your healing journey. Not all therapists are created equal, and many are re-abusive. How do you pick a counselor? How do you end a counseling relationship when it’s going poorly?
In this episode, Rachel and I discuss the suffering wife. Is suffering one of God’s purposes in marriage? And does an emotionally and spiritually abusive marriage reflect the relationship between Christ and His bride, the Church? (A transcript is available for those who would prefer to read rather than listen.)
Women who have lived in destructive relationships give away their voices and their honor in order to placate their abusive partner. In this episode Natalie and Rachel discuss what it means to honor yourself. Find out the one question you can ask yourself in 2019 to help you do exactly that.
You may have been taught that self-care is selfish, but is that really true? I believe self-care is essential to effectively caring for others. Here’s why.
This is the first article in a new series called Lessons from the Ladder. I get the title of this series from my original article called Ten Steps Out of Relationship Hell in which I write about the red hot ladder rungs we have to climb if we want to get out of the...
Some conservative Christians teach that God puts women in abusive marriages so they can better glorify Him through their suffering. What kind of a god requires the suffering of women and children in order to be glorified?