Divorce Archives

When the Abuse Survivor Has an Affair: Interview with Susan Estringel [Episode 285]

July 23, 2024

One of our listeners submitted a heavy question asking about how long she has to let the abuse continue. The snagging point? She had an affair. So, what does one do if they have an affair while in an emotionally abusive relationship? Does that mean they now deserve to be in an abusive marriage until they die? What are their options, and how can we think about this?

Join my candid conversation with Susan Estringel, one of our coaches within the Flying Free program, as we untangle this situation and speak with compassion to those of you who have lived this reality.

God Doesn’t Hate ALL Divorce [Episode 284]

July 16, 2024

“Does God really hate divorce? And why haven’t my years of praying brought any fruit?”

Abuse survivors ask me these two questions regularly, and today, I’m going to use Malachi 2:16 as well as a chapter from my newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, to answer them both. Beautiful butterfly, I pray this episode is an encouragement to you as you wrestle with these important topics.

Emotional and Spiritual Abuse Survivor Q&A [Episode 282]

July 2, 2024

Here are some of the questions I answered in today’s episode:

– Should I tell my adult children and close friends about the hidden emotional abuse I’m experiencing?
– I feel guilty because we’re in the middle of the divorce process, but all of a sudden, my husband has started being nicer than he’s ever been!
– Why am I so afraid to tell my husband that I am done with the marriage?
– How do I avoid being triggered in a situation where my needs are being ignored or misunderstood?
– Is my husband abusive, or just selfish and immature?
– And MORE!

Excommunication Series: Janet’s Story [Episode 267]

March 19, 2024

Have you ever been told you are incorrigible? Or how about contumacious, which means stubbornly and willfully disobedient to authority? Janet’s church promised to help and protect her, but when she decided to set a boundary to protect herself by divorcing her abuser, they turned on her with this vicious name-calling.

Sort of like her abuser, come to think of it.

In this final episode of our excommunication series, Janet outlines her story of waking up to abuse, seeking help from her church, and receiving a proverbial beating in return. Let’s unmask these particular wolves in Janet’s story so that we can learn how to unmask others in our own lives and in the lives of the people we care about.

Excommunication Series: Valerie’s Story [Episode 266]

March 12, 2024

In part two of our excommunication series, I interview Valerie, a former member of a Reformed Baptist church that excommunicated her for divorcing her unfaithful and emotionally abusive husband.

After years of receiving “help” from her church as she endured betrayal after betrayal from her husband, she said enough was enough. But even as she divorced her husband and then tried to leave the church peacefully, they wouldn’t allow it. They had to have the last word. Listen to Valerie’s story today.

Excommunication Series: Marieda’s Story [Episode 265]

March 5, 2024

“Your high-handed sin against God is a dangerous domain, especially for those that claim Christ and have identified with the church.” Mareida read these words in shock after her “sin” of running away from her abuser had reached the ears of her church.

Marieda has a story to tell, and you’ll want to listen in. It’s a story of freedom from emotional abuse and then being punished for it by the church that was supposed to protect her. It’s a story of deep betrayal but also rising from the ashes.

This is the first in a series of three episodes about excommunication.

Meet Marieda. Here is her excommunication story.

Category: Divorce